Don't Worry Be Happy (oh really...)

Life as a mother is often hectic. We worry. I think as we enter into motherhood, literally the second we hold our pink faced bundle of newborn joy we develop this extra " sense." I like to call it my Mom radar. Somehow at any given time we know our child is near. It is kind of a miracle actually. 

We can be in a huge auditorium and hear our child let out a cry, we stand up, rush out and find said child. A miracle? Maybe.  Apparently,  God decided Mom radar was something to be built into our anatomy that activates during child birth. I am half serious here friends. 

Obviously this declaration is in fun but you mothers out there know exactly what I mean. What would we do without our Mom radar?

 We need it to function, to be able to survive on three hours of sleep, to keep on top of activities, homework, running the home, planning play dates; more importantly helping our kids feel loved and nurturing their self esteem... and the list goes on.

Something I have had to learn being a special needs mom AND a typical mom is to not let the stress and worry that comes with this Mom radar overwhelm me. Because it can. Being a mother is the hardest job we wanted the most. Truly. Sometimes we can get so caught up in making sure everyone is happy, and everything is running perfectly that our own sense of well being starts to wilt. 

Raising children is fulfilling, fun, and amazing but it is also stressful, nerve racking and hard. We worry so much about the little people we are molding into functioning, well adjusted adults. Our Mom radars are on overdrive at times because we sincerely want our children to be happy.

And you know what, we are doing all right. Yes, children have minds of their own, they really do! They actually are going to make good decisions often and they are going to make mistakes too. We have to let them learn, without letting the worry of making their lives run so perfectly consume our own. You know deep down if you are a good mom. 

You try and teach your children good values and morals. You tell them daily you love them, show affection, even spoil (oh just a little) and your kids feel that love. Mothers across America are probably going to bed tonight worrying if they were good enough today, if their kids felt loved and valued, did they listen to them enough, was dinner ok, how would they accomplish their to do list tomorrow; so many sheep being counted as mothers everywhere lose sleep over their children's well being.

I am talking about myself too you know. We all do it. It is encoded in our DNA. We worry. We love. It is in our nature. But does this anxiety affect our happiness? Is there a point where we just have to trust that our parenting is paying off, that our kids are going to turn out how they are going to turn out despite how much we stress? I think at some point we have to do our best, and then just breathe. 

As I was pondering on this post the old mantra 

popped into my mind. Telling a mother, even me the biggest worrier of all, to not worry and be happy is almost laughable. How can I not worry about my kids? That is against my nature, against the laws of Mommyhood and I could "go to jail" if the other mothers knew I was adopting this policy. 

Am I telling you all to never worry about your children? No. Absolutely No. Am I saying after we have done our jobs above and beyond that we do need to relish in the moment of watching our kids live their lives happily then, Yes. 

In this case we deserve it. We work hard as moms. And we love our kids. All we want is their happiness and their success as good people, and it is ok to want that for ourselves too. 

So mothers out there, even special needs mothers like me who are pushed beyond our limits, give yourselves some credit, let your Mom radars relax a bit and be happy that we are doing all right. Ask your kids, I am sure if they knew how much you fretted over their well being they too would say " Hey Mommy...

Don't worry, be happy, cause we sure are."

- Brit