Saturday, August 30, 2014

She

I see her across the parking lot as I rush into the girl's school.  Somehow she manages to look so put together, even at 7:30 am. Her hair blow dried and blonde, lip gloss on and a cute outfit on her trim figure. Somehow I let this "she" make me feel a little less as I rush into my girl's classes. I am there to volunteer, do some good, share my talents. Ironically, she makes me feel sad.

I see her later that day too. At the grocery store this time.  I am struggling with my purchases and marking off my list. I look up to see her walking by with her perfectly behaved kids and cart full of organic groceries. Dark hair up in a purposely loose bun, cute Gap outfit and pretty smile. On top of her perfection, nothing processed in her cart! She seems to be the perfect, healthy mom I want to be but miss the boat at times. Darn it! My excited attempt at a new recipe falls a little flat as I realize it contains cream cheese and canned soup. She would never make that. 

She seems to be following me everywhere today. Sitting at the doctor's office with my youngest, I look over and see her sitting there. Flowered dress, creamy complexion, nose in a book as her perfect lil baby sleeps in her carrier. Blissful really. I am scrambling to get my disabled child's foot braces on while keeping my other girls entertained with their electronics and a fruit snack. To read a real book would be a dream. She seems to have it all. I think about her as I continue on with my day.

At church she is there. Bringing joy to all who know her, such an amazing person who volunteers for everything, serves in a big position, children know every scripture story, craft whiz, food storage pro. Her dress never has a wrinkle in it and her hair is always curled and her children look and act even more perfect. I long to be like her because she is just so nice and good. I feel I fall short as I watch her. 

She comes in all shapes and sizes. She sneaks in at every place I frequent, event I attend, this image of perfection that I can never be all of is there; waiting for me to find her and make me want to be like her. She lets my insecurities resurface and makes me forget the talents and gifts I do possess. Oh I wish SHE would not follow me everywhere! It's exhausting.

Fast forward. I am in line with my girls at the bank. Today is a good day. All three are happy, we managed to have cute outfits on and everything matches. My oldest is smiling at my youngest, giving her loves she chats happily in her wheelchair. My middle child is holding my hand and reciting the continents she is learning in class. We manage to make it through the line with no issues, I am patient, everyone is happy and I do look pretty put together today. I get what I need, and we make our way out of the teller line. 

Two women who were apparently behind us in line are talking to each other. I only get a small piece of their conversation but what I did hear I will never forget. 

" I don't know how She does it. " 

Looks of admiration are written across their faces and nods of awe are sent in my direction. I feel a warmth in my chest and smile, turning to leave the bank. 

As I push open the glass door to let my little girls through and finagle the wheelchair out the door with one hand I look up at my reflection in the glass. She looks pretty. Pretty good. Pretty happy, pretty put together. I am someone's " she " today. 

Aren't we all?


-- Brit

70 comments:

  1. You are my SHE often. I admire your positivity when I know some days stink. I admire the hard work and the time you take for the people that need you.

    Thank you... Great post!

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    1. thank you friend! I think we all compare ourselves to each other and it leads to missed opportunities and unwelcomed self esteem blows. I just think sometimes we all need to just give ourselves some credit. Motherhood is a hard job!

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  2. Loved it! I agree with both commenters above. You are often my 'she' as I watch you work tirelessly to ensure that all of your girls' needs are met and you create a celebration of childhood, milestones, holidays that will be precious memories to them all.

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    1. Oh thank you Angie. See I think you are pretty dang amazing. Aren't we all are biggest critic?

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  3. Oh my gosh I love this! We all want to be someone's "she" for a day. But little do we all know, that we always are.

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  4. Rock on with your retro sunglasses.

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  5. What a fabulous & inspiring post! Love those sunnies!

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  6. What a wonderful post.
    It's easy to get caught up with what we're dong wrong and what another family is doing better, quicker and smarter. This is a great reminder to find comfort in our own pace. -Thank You!

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  8. So well written! Remember "she" is really just a momma having a good day who will be makeup-less and in sweat pants tomorrow! ;)

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  9. Always remember that "she" has her days, too! :)

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  10. What a wonderful and inspirational post. I love the sunglasses.

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  12. Great post. However, keep in mind that you are only seeing she at this one moment in time. However, we don't know what trials and hardship is has had to bear, or is going through. She may be enduring a trial that she can't talk about, and the one thing she can do to feel goog about herself is get dressed up to leave the how. Having gone through a few very difficult trials, and working in RS, I gained a new perspective on how we see others, and what their realities are. No one has a perfect life - though it may seem that way on the outside..... We are all just trying to do our best :)

    Another thought - I was at the school this week and watched a mom come in, at 8am, all done up - hair, outfit, makeup, etc. and I actually had the thought that I am grateful that I can show up at the school in my yoga pants and be ok with that - that people can see me without makeup, and I'm not ashamed or embarrased. Because that is life. (Not saying this other mom doesn't think that - I don't even know her). But it's thumbs up to you - for being ok with who you are, comfortable in your own skin, being REAL, and doing the mom thing. :) I'm sure some women wish they had the confidence for that!

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    1. Sorry about the typos! I had to type it twice!

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    2. So true Megan. I think we know that deep down, but being our own biggest critics it is easy to feel less or a little " why me " at times. A lot of what I write is a way for me to remind myself that I am blessed, that I do have a good life. When step back and examine ourselves we can look past the hardships and see our strengths. Thx for commenting!

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  13. Loved this!! Some days us Mom's are together and sometimes we're not! You never know what someone's true struggles and it's so easy to compare ourselves to others, when really all we need to focus on is our children. Well said Brittany!

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  14. This is very inspiring - wonderful! :) I like to be like that someday to someone too :)

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  15. I'm sure "She" will be what she wants to be when she grow up and it's all because of you!

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  16. You are very inspiring to all moms out there. What a wonderful post.

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    1. Oh thank you;) and thanks for reading!

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  17. Great piece…. there always is a "she" isn't there! One day it's you, one day it's someone else. Great reminder, and well written!

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  18. Nothing compares to a mothers love and admiration of their child. What a great testiment to your daughter.

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    1. Thank you Kathy. I appreciate the kind words!

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  19. I like the way you wrote that. Far too often we are consumed with comparing everyone else's outward appearance to our own when in fact, everyone has their good days and bad.

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  20. Great article thanks for sharing. It reminds us to be grateful as we have more than we think.

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  21. What a beautiful and insightful post. We so often look at what other people have and we don't, that we forget the wonderful things that we do have. Thank you! I will be sharing this on my Facebook page.

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  22. What a concept! I really never thought about it that way, but oh so true. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

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  23. Beautiful! Now all we need to do is remember the positive message in this wise story... We are someone's she every day! Smile.

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  24. I love this so much. Women in particular seem to think that if everything isn't done exactly the way they think it should that they're not on top of their game. Let me just say that if it weren't for women, the world would fall down around all of our ears. Thanks, super women of the world!

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    1. Amen Ben, you are awesome! Thx for reading!

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  25. What an inspiring post. Everyone is going through something none of us can see. We may look and act put together, but somewhere inside of us there is some form of sadness about something. My Mom used to say, "You never know who you're talking too". I think that is true. Wonderful post!

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    1. I love your mom's advice. Thx for reading!

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  26. Loved this! So true!! Too many times we can mistakenly assume everyone is so put together all the time, but little do we know it could just be one good day, haha! - Ana @MommysBundle

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  27. You expressed something all moms feel so often. Chaos seems to be the mantra in our house. A very well organized chaos! Thanks for sharing this.

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  28. What a great message to send. Whether they're the she, or we're the she, putting our best foot forward is really what matters. :)

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  29. First time finding your blog.. But I must say, perfect moms with all their organic foods and whatnot, fancy clothes are overrated.. but great message!

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  30. Great post! I can be difficult to not compare ourselves to others. It's important to focus on our own selves and be proud of who we are.

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  31. this is such a great and inspirational post! i love how you took the admiration positively. As there are others who admires but goes the other way around

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  32. very inspirational! i love reading them all! being positive is very important!

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  33. I love this confident and inspiring post! Very well written and very positive!

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  34. That's awesome! I literally got chills reading this post. I think we all have moments of insecurity and there are always those "perfect" seeming women with the nicest clothes and most well behaved children. Just remember, they have off days too. What an inspiration. LOVED READING IT! :)

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  35. What a great reminder that comparisons are crazy. But we all do it! Thanks for brightening up my day with your post!

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  36. I rarely feel like the "she" but I thank you for the reminder that I might just be sometimes :) Love this!

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